Saturday, August 30, 2008

Joking - Indigo Girls (for john mccain)

You were only joking, brother

With all due respect to Sarah Palin, who has made history and who clearly is a talented, accomplished woman, like so many women I are some facebook and twitter status updates of people I know after the announcement:

newsflash: 24 years later, Republican Party follows suit (white male, D)

yes she is exactly who you need and who this country needs (white female, former HRC supporter)

is liking's comment, "Brilliant Pick or Dan Quayle in a Dress?" (white male, not sure)

Sarah Palin may be a woman...but she is still a gun-toting pro-lifer (white female, D)

is incensed and insulted, as all women should be (30yr old white female, D)

thinks Sarah Palin looks like Tina Fey (white male, not sure)

is wondering what kind of president Obama will be. (white male, R lobbyist)

now realizes that the universe wants Obama to lead the U.S. For reals, not just in the dream land in my head. (white female, D I think)

isn't sure what more to say to his daughter who, upon hearing John McCain's choice for VP, shouted "Is he on crack!" So far, I've said "no." (same R from above)

Sunday, August 24, 2008

The Galway Girl - Steve Earle

Watched a really horrible movie last night - PS - I Love You. The absolute best thing about the movie was this song, which we heard twice - in both cases sung by "Irishmen." Totally the best part of the movie.

It isn't the first time I've watched a really bad movie and come away thinking, "well, at least there was that song in it." So, here are a few other examples:

5. We Don't Need Another Hero - Tina Turner from MadMax Beyond the Thunderdome. I barely made it through that movie. Tina, on the other hand, belted out a great one.

4. I Will Always Love You - Whitney Houston - from The Bodyguard. OK, so this movie wasn't a total zero, but pretty freakin' cheesy fare. This may be the best demonstration of the pipes that Whitney had pre- "crack is whack."

3. Kiss from a Rose - Seal - from Batman Forever. Val Kilmer? What a disappointment.

2. You Got It - Whoopi & Mary Louise Parker - From Boys on the Side. First, it's against lesbian law to say this movie sucked, but, um, it was not so good. This scene, however tear-jerky, was a killer, and the soulfulness with which thew Whoopster sings is breathtaking. And then the movie ends with Bonnie Raitt doing her version of this great Roy Orbison song. personal favorite example from a recent movie

1. Mr. Brightside - The Killers, as butchered by a Cameron Diaz sing-a-long in the awful movie, The Holiday. This seemed to have promise - Cameron Diaz (that smile), Jude Law (those eyes), Kate Winslet (that accent), and Jack Black (that humor). UGH.

Of the four of you who actually read this blog, got any to add?

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Daughters - John Mayer

John Mayer - Daugh...

"So Mothers be good to your daughters too..."

This morning I read a blog post that I can't get our of my brain, and the refrain of John Mayer's song is the background track. While the song is more about fathers and daughters, there is that cautionary reminder in the final line of the chorus.

The blog post was written by a lovely woman I met at a conference a month or so ago, and since then I have been reading her blog. She is not a "super blogger" in the sense of Dooce or her peers, and maybe because of that - and the fact that we seem on first blush to have a fair amount in common - I like reading her posts. I'm not linking to the post I refer to, because I don't in any way want the author to think that I am judging or criticizing her, and while they say that once you put shit out there in the blogosphere it's public domain, it just doesn't feel right.

But here's the gist of the post: Explanation of why distance had been created by blogger and her mom - values, lack of interest in her kids, her life, disappointment. Young daughter asking mom, "why don't we ever see our other grandma? " Mom trying graciously to explain history, hurt and distance in a way that doesn't justify, but is honest. Next line:
My mother died tonight. I'll never get a chance to try to bridge the chasm between us. But I also know in my heart that it was unlikely that the attempt would have made a difference.

That kicked my ass. Wasn't expecting it really. Got me thinking.

The relationship between mothers and daughters is so very complex. I think about the little microcosm here in our house. My relationship with my mom is quite good. She lives a country away, but we email ongoingly, talk every other weekend, share a lot of core beliefs, values, and foibles. Not perfect, and I have disappointments, as I'm sure she does, but we are lucky.

Debbie's relationship with her mom is very good now, but that wasn't always the case. Now they talk daily - mostly because of her Dad's cancer treatment. I have watched Debbie work hard to bridge the differences and hurts and to forgive, if not forget. That is awfully hard to do and I admire her for it. But I also totally get that it is not the best or healthiest path for everyone.

Debbie and Carly's relationship is more of the "modern" type - they laugh, they fight, they make fun of people together. They like the same kind of music (mostly), we know a whole lot about her friends, boys, fears, and accomplishments. As time has gone on, they even play beer pong together. If I had a dollar for every time Carly said, "Mom, you are going to be in the room with me when I give birth," I could buy a bottle of Grey Goose.

I have two goddaughters, and they have two mothers. That presents twice as much opportunity for warmth, support, fun and unconditional love. And of course, 2x as much opportunity for disappointment, and the other yucky stuff. I have confidence the former will be the case, but of course time will tell.

Several of my friends have had girls - ranging in age from 10 to two months. These mothers are 21st century - open, empowered, strong and spectacular (in my humble opinion) , just as i suspect my new blogger friend is. They have the chance to get it "more right." I know they will.

Friday, August 1, 2008

Girls in Their Summer Clothes - Bruce

06 - Bruce Springs...

Growing up in Northern California, we went to the beach pretty frequently. Generally a day trip. A couple of times my folks rented a house and we stayed for a week in or near Santa Cruz. 40 years later I come to the Outer Banks with la familia and friends each late July/early August for a week. The experiences are somewhat different:

1968: "Stop fighting with your brother about who sits in the 'way back,' it's only a 45 minute drive"
2008: "Let's drive 4 hours to Norfolk, stay the night, and drive the second 4 hours on Saturday am"

1968: "Make sure you pack a sweatshirt, it'll be chilly at night"
2008: "Close the doors, it's letting in all the hot air and the AC can't keep up"

1968: Cliffs, wetsuits, the Big Dipper and frisbee
2008: Dunes, sting rays, Kitty Hawk Kites and cornhole

1968: "Donna, you have been in the water for four hours, it's time to come out."
2008: "Donna, are you ever going to get that lazy butt out of the chair and go swimming?"

1968: "Ok, everyone, put on your baby oil."
2008: "Who's got the 42 SPF?"

1968: Forecast for the week: Sunny, sunny, sunny, sunny, sunny, sunny, sunny
2008: Forecast for the week: Sunny, Scattered Thunderstorms, Sunny, Isolated Thunderstorms..."

1968: Sittin on the Dock of the Bay - Otis Redding
2008: Breakout - Miley Cyrus

1968 or 2008, there aren't too many things better than the beach.